Well I have finally figured out why God finally gave me children after all of these years - to test my patience. Not just to test it a little, but to test it a lot!
I have to say that once Colt turned a 1 1/2 months things changed quite a bit. He became colicky and boy does this child like to scream and cry! I'm not talking just a little bit of crying. I'm talking about crying ALL THE TIME! Crying to the point where I have just become numb to it basically. Then the numbness wears off and I'm left with a lot of frustration. Then on top of that, I've got a VERY energetic 1 year-old who is just dying to just go out and run! He gets into everything and has now learned that climbing is his new favorite thing to do. He is also cutting teeth like crazy (now has 8 on top, 4 that are just breaking the gums and 4 already there and 6 on bottom with 2 more breaking through where he will soon have 8). You would think I would have lost my mind through all of this but nope, I haven't.
And as crazy as it sounds, I wouldn't trade any of it for anything in this world!
There are days I just want to lock myself into a room and scream or just turn up the TV really loud and ignore everything. Then there are days I just sit and watch Cash play with his toys and Colt discover something new and I can't help but be the luckiest person in the whole world. Sometimes it chokes me up to watch my boys grow up. I now know why my mom cried at milestones when my brother and I are were growing up. You just get this feeling inside of you like, "wow they are mine".
Having good days are often, having "great" days are rare, having a down day is normal. We are getting to the point where there are a lot of good days, with a few great days in between. Colt seems to be getting a little better and Cash is just Cash. He is hilarious! It's been really hard dealing with Colt just because Cash was such a good baby, but then Colt is my challenge and I have a feeling that will change once the boys get older. Cash will be my challenge and then Colt will be my angel haha
I got asked the other day, "Do you take naps?" I just laughed and said, "what are those?" I stopped taking naps once Colt turned a month old because getting him and Cash to sleep at the same time is one of the hardest things to do! One is always awake, and if I can get both of them to nap at the same time, I have about 45 minutes to myself to shower, eat, clean, watch one of my shows, etc... A lot of time everything but me getting cleaned up gets done.
Again, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
This weekend my best friends little boys turns 2 and I am still shocked at how fast time goes by. Then I got to thinking, this weekend I will have a 16 month old and a 4 month old. Crazy!!!
Besides the boys, I have been able to juggle getting the dogs taken care of and other things around the house. I am lucky to have a supportive husband who helps me when he gets home from work - even if he has had a long day. And somewhere in between that, I find time to head to the gym for an hour.
How do I juggle it? I have no clue, but I know one thing - God can keep throwing things at me, because the test of "patience" - well I think I'm handling it pretty damn good - even though some days are rough.
3 comments:
I bet you are doing awesome and way better than you think you are. Moms are way to hard on themselves! I think you boys are so so cute!
I remember trying to potty train Hadlee when she was 19 months (because I knew she was ready) with a 3 month old hanging off of my boob. I have had people ask how I survived and I honestly don't know. I really don't remember a lot of it. I think we just do. In a year or two, your boys are going to be the best of friends and it will be smooth sailing. :) Ok, I don't know if it's ever smooth sailing, but you know what I mean. :)
I agree that good husbands are amazing!! I don't know how I'd doit w/out Jason.
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